The idea of a romantic meeting, with falling in love and subsequent marriage with a soulmate has firmly rooted in the culture. Thus, a grown-up person has already got a certain image of ideal love relationships. And they seek to find and follow it. By the way, examples of ideal love for life can really be found. However, the truth is that they are not found very often and are not a mandatory life scenario. And when people cannot build relationships in accordance with this perfect picture, they get upset and think that life has failed. They think about their past relationships all the time and give up on their personal lives.
However, this approach to building personal relationships is destructive. Moreover, it becomes a trap for both partners, woven from their expectations. Nobody urges you to abandon the love life or the idea to strengthen the existing relationship. Nonetheless, everyone should understand that the human psyche is changeable. It develops with us in the process of life, and not always these changes go synchronously and in the same direction for both partners. Sometimes it happens that the relationship has exhausted itself, and the best decision is to break up without scandals, mutual reproaches, and claims even if it is about a young single mother.
Besides, it’s also worth accepting that parting can be painful, especially if you have been living together for many years, having shared memories and habits. It is worth giving yourself time to enter a new phase of life. And here, many people make a fatal mistake, trying to forget about the ex-partner.
Why is it a mistake and why can it be even useful to think about your past relationships?
If you have been in a relationship for a long time, this is an occasion to think about the fact that a person is not so bad (something attracted you to them). And you probably had a great time together that was full of joyful events and moments. You experienced unforgettably beautiful emotions. For example, when you are sad, such memories can lead to a positive reassessment (including the current situation).
Entering a love relationship, you get a truly unique psychological and emotional experience that will never be repeated with another person. Moreover, it will be a completely different relationship. And this experience naturally becomes part of your personal experience. It would be pretty irrational to refuse it because you just impoverish your life.
Every past relationship brings something new to our awareness of the intimate sphere of life. Therefore, you should not forbid yourself to remember ex-lovers, including in the context of intimacy. Moreover, you can use what you have received from that period of your intimate life in the relationship with your current partner. At the same time, the latter does not need to know about the subtleties and tricks of pleasure. You are happy now, right? A true relationship should make you feel more attractive and desirable.
If the experience of past relationships is interpreted intelligently and constructively, it can become a precious source. It will help you protect your current love from committed mistakes. Therefore, memories can be very useful in this context.
The best parting is one after which you let the person go quietly, with a sense of appreciation for the time spent together. As well as for that small or long joint life for two that you had. If you succeed, then the memories can be very pleasant and positive.